"create some trauma even the best railfan might have trouble returning to rails."Whoa, here!! Ever been in an automobile accident? I would suspect that most of us have. Does that make you decide to quit driving or riding in automobiles? Ever fallen off a bicycle? Did you get back on?
Let's don't descend from rationality into paranoia. Regardless of those that go way off the deep end on precautions, life is uncertain. The perception of safety and security is just that, a perception. No matter what you do you can not protect yourself from all random events.
Yes, we should take reasonable safety precautions, but not to the point that the precautions exceed the benefits. There are certain times and places that I avoid driving because of the danger of drunks driving. I wear seatbelts in a car always, and have since before there was any law on it, because the benefits outweigh the minor inconvenience. Yet, I knew a man who would not wear a seatbelt because a friend of his burned in a car fire and the perception was that he could have been gotten out if the seatbelt had not held him. I am not particularly a fan of air bags becuase of the danger to small children. Here, I am not convinced that, if you had your seatbelt on, the benefit exceeds the danger.
Let's look at what happened: The train left the tracks at a speed of over 70 mph, several cars ended up on their sides and only one person was killed. Try that one with a bus or automobile. It speaks volumes for the strength and safety of the American railway passenger car.
Look at a plane crash. Usually everybody / most everybody dies. Look at a train wreck. Usually everybody / most everybody survives. Yet, I still get on a plane some 20 to 30 times a year.
We kill approximately 40,000 people a year in automobile accidents in the US, that is over 100 A DAY, and it is usually local news only. We kill one person in a train accident and it is international news. There is no rationality in reporting, only a search for the sensational.
To answer your question, no, I have never been in a derailment. I have ridden past the remains of derailments, including one where it was a collision between passenger trains. (That was not in the US.) I was riding a train that hit an automobile once. I have been involved in analyzing a derailment once.