posted
Another sorry attempt; (with apologies to Mr. Slotkin...)
There once was a man named Norman Who one day upon Amtrak went storming. Though on the train all went well Upon Southwest not so swell, He was released with a Corkscrew'd warning!
I'll quit now...
Posts: 588 | From: East San Diego County, CA | Registered: Oct 2004
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quote:Originally posted by Henry Kisor: Ira, no, I don't think we knew each other during the '60s protests. I was an Eisenhower Republican before becoming born again when Seymour Hersh broke the My Lai story in 1969.
But I've read your verse elsewhere. It's marvelous. I hope you bottle it and market it.
Thanks for your appreciation and acknowledgment, especially given your writing and editorial background. My next "bottling," as it were, will be a piece appearing in the next issue (fall, I think) of Inter-Religious Insight. Somewhat esoteric and niche, but an acceptance/publication nevertheless. I'll send the piece to you off list if you are interested. It is not a religious advocating poem. It is about Noah and his search for peace after the flood.
Ira
Posts: 300 | From: Denver, CO USA | Registered: Aug 2000
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posted
Let's clarify a bit regarding the corkscrew.
From an en-route phone call with a friend, who is likely on ten flights for every one of mine, I was advised that the corkscrew would likely not make it through TSA.
When I got off the RTD bus at KDEN, there were two TSA people standing outside on break. I sheepishly approached them ("sure, can we help?") and showed them the corkscrew. They said because it had a small sharp extrusion for removal of seals, it would not make it through. They further said I could check the bag (volks, I've traveled overseas on several occasions with only carry on bags) or there was an airport Post Office from which I could ship it home. I chose to stand over a trash barrel and say "adios'. It was of no particular sentimental value, even though I can think of life situations in which a corkscrew could have great value as such.
Posts: 9977 | From: Clarendon Hills, IL USA (BNSF Chicago Sub MP 18.71) | Registered: Apr 2002
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posted
Ah, the wonders of the TSA: Deadly corkscrews, threatening tweezers, lethal-sized bottles of Johnson's Baby Shampoo.
And doddering 68-year-old geezers like me with stainless steel knees (they make dangerous cudgels) and titanium hardware in the spine (it could be harvested for stealth aircraft construction) . . . That always results in a full body search (non-cavity, however).
Coincidentally, after a recent flight I discovered that TSA missed a fully loaded and cocked corkscrew I had forgotten was in my carryon bag.
In my opinion, TSA checks are nothing but political theater to reassure us traveling rubes that the federal government is on the ball. Has it ever been?
This fall, when TSA begins its Amtrak checks, we can look forward to black-clad gentlemen in riding boots, jodhpurs and Sam Browne belts barking through our compartment doors, "Papieren, bitte!"
I will be the shifty-eyed fellow who looks like Claude Rains, cowering by the window, sweaty hand on the revolver in his raincoat . . .
What movie was that, anyway?
Posts: 2236 | From: Evanston, Ill. and Ontonagon, Mich. | Registered: Feb 2007
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posted
I doubt if you are addressing "Casablanca", Mr. Kisor, but one movie that does come to mind, and currently making rounds of the various Starz channels, is "Julia", starring Jane Fonda and Vanessa Regrave.
This movie is ostensibly fact based upon playwright Lillian Hellman, US citizen and of Jewish faith, about her travels within 1930's Nazi Germany.
There is also the question if the story is simply one more piece of fiction.
Nevertheless, there are rail scenes (Strasbourg, FR subbing for Berlin) including one Mr. Kisor envisions complete with "Papieren, bitte1".
Posts: 9977 | From: Clarendon Hills, IL USA (BNSF Chicago Sub MP 18.71) | Registered: Apr 2002
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posted
Mr. Kisor, I think you've seen too many "noir" films...as to removing the window seals with a corkscrew, I'm reminded of the old "Twilight Zone" episode where the gentleman sees the monster on the wing, disassembling the plane. Of course, he had a loaded .38 revolver to fight that demon. Maybe the TSA thought Mr. Norman fit the "profile" of a seal-removing corkscrew smuggler, or some new security definition?
Posts: 588 | From: East San Diego County, CA | Registered: Oct 2004
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quote:Originally posted by Henry Kisor: And doddering 68-year-old geezers like me with stainless steel knees (they make dangerous cudgels) and titanium hardware in the spine (it could be harvested for stealth aircraft construction) . . . That always results in a full body search (non-cavity, however).
For about three years running, when we came back from Taiwan and made our multi-stop jaunt around the US to see family, we ALWAYS got pulled out for the special search at every boarding. Finally found out that was because we were running on tickets that had their origin, termination, and sale point overseas. My wife's metal knees and my plate on left femur and bolt in hip socket further compounded the problem. Maybe flashing either a passport or Mississippi driver's licenses for identification also made up more suspicious.
Posts: 2810 | From: Olive Branch MS | Registered: Nov 2002
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posted
Ira Slotkin: I enjoyed your July 7th poem. I liked the five-line AABBA stanza structure, the occasional apparently controlled loosening of the rhythm, and the occasional apparently controlled loosening of the exactitude of rhyme. While there is the one drawback that that sort of controlled loosening can lead unperceptive versifiers to form wrong ideas, by extrapolation, about what degrees of inexactitude readers can be expected to tolerate without annoyance, your poem is still a nice production.
Railroad Bob: Your July 10th limerick reminded me of an old cautionary limerick for amateur poets:
There once was a man from Japan Whose limericks never would scan. When someone asked why, He replied with a sigh, "It's because I always try to squeeze as many words into the last line as I possibly can".
Posts: 86 | Registered: Mar 2005
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posted
Offered with apologies to all, just a bit of fun:
One summer’s morn in Illinois, Woke GBN serene and snug, And thought on Amtrak he should ride, Might he have caught the railfan bug?
To Denver’s rocky mountain clime, Aboard the Zephyr he would quest, Ensconced in a roomette sublime, And sluiced with vintage he loves best.
To journey home he then gave thought, And set upon a trip by air, A Southwest ticket could be bought, On payment of a modest fare.
Online our hopeful traveler went, And booked his sojourn at posthaste, Then dashed by RTA, hell-bent, To CUS, no time to waste.
He lingered briefly in the Hall, Before he boarded Number Five, Eighteen-point three four! What a ball! Soon Mississippi shores arrive.
A flatiron steak, a flooded scene, Our traveler now in mellow state, His glass in hand, his mind serene, So what if he was one hour late?
The upper berth he then let down, The porter asked, “Your straps OK?” A glimpse of fair Ottumwa town, His slumber he would not delay.
At breakfast, as he westward rolled, He ordered French toast railroad-style, Saw coal trains by the score untold, Enjoying syrup some find vile.
2:25 behind (a trice), The train pulled into DUT, (or pushed, I add, to be precise), Now where to find that NYT?
A Starbucks, by a lucky hunch, Provides the paper of renown, The Oxford House is fine for lunch, And then a quick whip ‘round downtown.
A bus (the RDT) he caught, And so he rode to DIA, But thunderstorms, he learned, had wrought, Bad news: a damn two-hour delay.
Then TSA would confiscate, His corkscrew (no great loss, by far), Before he could attain his gate, Now what to do? To find a bar!
The cocktails there our traveler bought, Caused him to balk when time to pay, The airport tippling lesson taught, The time had come to fly away.
Amongst a throng of flip-flopped proles, The safety floorshow now is past, The aircraft on the tarmac rolls, Our GBN sits back, aghast.
The wine is free? Oh, what a treat! What is it? Only God could say, But strapped into an airline seat, It helps to pass the time away.
The earth regained, our traveler’s home, The “bug,” it seems, is satisfied, The urge to go and joyful roam, On Amtrak cannot be denied.
Posts: 103 | From: St. Louis, MO USA | Registered: Oct 2002
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posted
Mr. Stlboomer: Your epic recitation reminds me of another ancient 'pome:'
'In Xanadu did GBN a stately pleasure-dome decree: Where Old Muddy, the sacred river, ran through caverns measureless to man Down to a sunless sea. That with music loud and long, in his Southwest Surly-lines dome in air, And all should cry, Beware ! Beware ! His flashing eyes, his floating hair ! Weave a circle round him thrice, And close your eyes with holy dread, For GBN on honey-dew hath fed, And drunk the milk of paradise.'
...now I am really done! with apologies to all and Coleridge too, I shall gracefully exit this Poetry Zoo, where the 'milk of paradise' was (probably opium) and not the good red wine that suits Mr. Norman more than fine!
Posts: 588 | From: East San Diego County, CA | Registered: Oct 2004
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quote:Originally posted by Ocala Mike: As long as we're making lots of poetry references, I wonder if Robert Frost had Amtrak in mind when he wrote "The Road Less Traveled."
Only if Frost wrote the poem in 1971 or later! Maybe this thread should be pulled down anyway for deviating too far off original course, like that other "disappearing thread" being talked about. Comparing our beloved Mr. Norman to Kublai Khan is perhaps something of a "stretch." GBN surely prefers passenger trains to camel accomodations. Posts: 588 | From: East San Diego County, CA | Registered: Oct 2004
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quote:Originally posted by Henry Kisor: And doddering 68-year-old geezers like me with stainless steel knees (they make dangerous cudgels) and titanium hardware in the spine (it could be harvested for stealth aircraft construction) . . . That always results in a full body search (non-cavity, however).
For about three years running, when we came back from Taiwan and made our multi-stop jaunt around the US to see family, we ALWAYS got pulled out for the special search at every boarding. Finally found out that was because we were running on tickets that had their origin, termination, and sale point overseas. My wife's metal knees and my plate on left femur and bolt in hip socket further compounded the problem. Maybe flashing either a passport or Mississippi driver's licenses for identification also made up more suspicious.
Geesh.......I wasn't aware that one needed a Passport to enter Mississippi now?
The Magnolia State, like Canada, is going to have to wait for a more favorable exchange rate before I bother to renew my passport which expired a couple of years ago!
-------------------- David Pressley
Advocating for passenger trains since 1973!
Climbing toward 5,000 posts like the Southwest Chief ascending Raton Pass. Cautiously, not nearly as fast as in the old days, and hoping to avoid premature reroutes. Posts: 4203 | From: Western North Carolina | Registered: Feb 2004
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quote:Originally posted by Gilbert B Norman: Oh and finally now that the trip is completed, here is what I adressed regarding "can't afford NOT to" fares. Chi to Den on Amtrak was $250.75, of which $170 was the Roomette.
A Year later; Recession or not, do a quick check for a Roomette CHI-DEN departing tomorrow #5(5). Get your smelling salts ready when the itinerary and fare are returned.
Polly the Parrot says it best: "Supply and Demand,Supply and Demand,Supply and Demand,"
Posts: 9977 | From: Clarendon Hills, IL USA (BNSF Chicago Sub MP 18.71) | Registered: Apr 2002
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posted
Mr. Norman I have yet to get beyond the third paragraph of you submission. I was STOPPED in my tracks by your unusual use of the three letter station codes for Denver and Chicago's Midway Airport. Are you alright? Best regards, Rodger
Posts: 112 | From: Merrimac, MA | Registered: Nov 2007
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I think he means CHI and DEN are the Amtrak codes, whereas MDW and DIA are the aviation codes for the same cities. There's also that unusual one for O'Hare>>> ORD. They're discussing Nashville, TN in another thread on the Board.
Mr. Norman's OK! Don't worry... Posts: 588 | From: East San Diego County, CA | Registered: Oct 2004
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posted
DIA/KDIA is Washington Dulles International. When Denver moved from Stapelton to the present Denver International (talk about an underused facility - things were getting thin when I was there; never mind today) the IATA/ICAO codes remained DEN/KDEN.
Again, be it noted we toss a lot of alphabet soup about in our discussions; all too many IATA Airport and Amtrak Station Codes are one in same. Within the CONUS, the ICAO is simply the IATA prefixed with a K; hardly the case elsewhere in the world i.e. LHR/EGLL. (of course Europe, Great britain, London is reasonably descriptive)
Posts: 9977 | From: Clarendon Hills, IL USA (BNSF Chicago Sub MP 18.71) | Registered: Apr 2002
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posted
I'm really glad this thread got resurrected so I could read those great poems again!
-------------------- My new "default" station (EKH) has no baggage service or QuikTrak machine, but the parking is free! And the NY Central RR Museum is just across the tracks (but not open at Amtrak train times. . ..) Posts: 337 | From: Goshen, IN | Registered: Jun 2006
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GBN surely prefers passenger trains to camel accomodations. ![[Smile]](smile.gif)
